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The Punch Players: Punjabi

Photo of Punjabi Interviewer: Punjabi, I know you're from India. Did you study with a yogi?

Punjabi: Oh, no, no. I came to this country to study mathematics at the University. But people thought that because I was from India, I must meditate. They all asked me to teach. I said to myself, "What the heck? You just close your eyes." I supported myself through college.

Interviewer: Really? So you don't meditate?

Punjabi: I do now.

Interviewer: You make your living from that?

Punjabi: Oh no no. I also teach the sitar.

Interviewer: Wonderful. Did you bring your sitar? Could you play something for us tonight?

Punjabi: Oh no no, I don't play. People think that because I am from India, I must play the sitar. They all ask me for lessons. I said to myself, What the heck? Wherever they put their fingers, it sounds like Ravi Shankar to them. I bought a car giving sitar lessons.

Interviewer: It sounds like you've made a good career out of being from India. Did you ever become a mathematician?

Punjabi: Well, after I got my doctorate, I went looking for a job. People think that because I am from India, I must be intelligent, hard-working, and grateful to work for half as much as everyone else. I could not get a decent offer.

Interviewer: Oh I'm sorry. That must have been a disappointment for you.

Punjabi: Oh no no. By that time, I was teaching Indian cookery and buying a house. The experience taught me a great spiritual lesson. A nugget of truth which has brought me great peace and happiness.

Interviewer: What is that?

Punjabi: I am teaching a workshop about it next weekend. $300 and I accept worktrade.

Besides all the numerous activities mentioned above, I also perform with the Punch Players, often as a kindly and sagacious manager, physicist, or programmer. -- Yours truly, Punjabi